CAT MACROS

Bitch Please

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on May 31, 2010

behind a cut bitch please woman with knife lol cat macro

Cut? Bitch please

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Damn Right It’s Better Than Yours

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on January 15, 2010

milkshake brings all the boys to the yard kelis lol cat macro

Damn right it’s better than yours

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My Macros Bring All The Cats To The Yard

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on January 15, 2010

milkshake brings all the boys to the yard kelis lol cat macro

My macros bring all the cats into the yard

The Surrounding Region Of Interstellar Space Has Reached Maximum Capacity

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on January 9, 2010

astronaut outer space fulla stars mapquest driving lol cat macro

Dear supreme universal deity who I identify with and mistakenly state ownership. The surrounding region of interstellar and interplanetary space has reached maximum capacity and density of self-luminous heavenly celestial bodies.

The Fail Jail

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on December 26, 2009

fail jail prison life sentence behind bars kitten lol cat macro

The fail jail. Your macro, it deserves a life sentence

They R Make Fun Of Me

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macro Wank, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on December 12, 2009

A couple of weeks ago WordPress temporarily deactivated this blog due to a complaint about copyright infringement. Obviously, I can’t show you the guilty macro, but here’s a reconstruction which I put together (badly) in Photoshop. The Persian cat in the original photo was smokey grey and had a much better gloomy, fucked off expression.

they r make fun of me funny lol cat macro

Google searches reveal that the author of the photo posted it on Flickr back in January 2007 under the username *ShelbieMyLove*. The image was entitled “Shelbie Flickrs While Mom’s Away”. It seems to have been quickly appropriated by the unknown macroista to create their masterpiece, and the macro made its debut on icanhascheezburger. Upon discovery of the macro, *ShelbieMyLove* apparently “FREAKED OUT” and flounced from Flickr in May 2007 amidst dire warnings to anyone who dared to steal her amateur cat photo, which she had posted for all to gank on a public website.

whining about copyright lol cat macro

*ShelbieMyLove* then embarked on an obsessive campaign to purge the macro from the internets; a campaign which I believe is unprecedented in the entire history of cat macro copyright whining and serious fucking business. Here are a few more examples of crazy cat lady’s doomed-to-failure DMCA-ing.

September 21st 2007
November 1st 2007
March 20th 2008
April 17th 2008
December 19th 2008
November 21st 2009

I also found an interesting thread on Flickr, which provides a small insight into the world of *ShelbieMyLove* and reveals a love of the exclamation mark so indicative of the very special, passive aggressive, snowflake. Shelbie the cat is apparently a peke-faced Persian with a misaligned jaw, meaning it can’t eat unassisted; Shelbie’s ‘Mom’ has to “finger feed” the wretched creature. But, hey, never mind, because its diet is 100% “organic/natural!“, “absolutely NO animal bi [sic] products!” Ironically, *ShelbieMyLove* is untroubled by the inherent cruelty of breeding highly unnatural ultra-type Persians, which suffer from a wide variety of unpleasant congenital health issues, including jaw deformities.

buying paraplegic cat leash lol cat macro

Your Font Scares Kitty

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on December 11, 2009

bad scary font typeface impact lol cat macro

Your font scares kitty

Bad Font

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on December 11, 2009

bad font fail typeface impact lol cat macro

Bad font

Font Fail

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on December 11, 2009

bad font fail typeface macro technique lol cat macro

FAIL
See that’s what a macro font should look like. Not any of these other harder to read fonts, colors and effects

The Fail Is Strong In This One

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on December 8, 2009

star wars the force light sabre fail strong lol cat macro

The fail is strong in this one

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