CAT MACROS

Why The Fuck Are My Paws

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on November 20, 2011

cat_paws_up_crying_questioning_philosophical_mysteries_of_cat

Why the fuck are my paws

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A True Sense Of Accomplishment

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on January 6, 2011

window venetian blind destroyed art cat macro

Raoul felt a true sense of accomplishment as he basked in the completion of his artistry.

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The New Curling Rocks

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on March 6, 2010

curling rocks winter olympics gold medal ice lol cat macro

The Olympic teams found the new curling rocks vastly superior to the old

You Know I Can’t Fucking Read

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on February 14, 2010

feline literacy cat reading a note book tetrabinary lol cat macro

Oh for Christ’s sake, Nancy. You know I can’t fucking read.

Look At This Fucking Cat Playing Piano

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on January 13, 2010

look at cat playing piano keyboard music meme lol cat macro

Look at this fucking cat playing piano. Just look at it for fuck’s sake

Ugly Or Not…Stan Was Going To Tap That Ass

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on January 9, 2010

ugly chick girl ass lol cat macro

Ugly or not…Stan was going to tap that ass

New Year’s Eve

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on December 30, 2009

new years eve drunk cats dancing booze alcohol lol cat macro

This New Year’s Eve, please get your cats drunk it’s fucking hilarious

What Are We Staring At?

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on December 19, 2009

cats staring at wall nothing mystery lol cat macro

So…what are we staring at?
Nothing.
Why?
Well, if we stare at nothing long enough she’ll have a total nervous breakdown.

They R Make Fun Of Me

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macro Wank, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on December 12, 2009

A couple of weeks ago WordPress temporarily deactivated this blog due to a complaint about copyright infringement. Obviously, I can’t show you the guilty macro, but here’s a reconstruction which I put together (badly) in Photoshop. The Persian cat in the original photo was smokey grey and had a much better gloomy, fucked off expression.

they r make fun of me funny lol cat macro

Google searches reveal that the author of the photo posted it on Flickr back in January 2007 under the username *ShelbieMyLove*. The image was entitled “Shelbie Flickrs While Mom’s Away”. It seems to have been quickly appropriated by the unknown macroista to create their masterpiece, and the macro made its debut on icanhascheezburger. Upon discovery of the macro, *ShelbieMyLove* apparently “FREAKED OUT” and flounced from Flickr in May 2007 amidst dire warnings to anyone who dared to steal her amateur cat photo, which she had posted for all to gank on a public website.

whining about copyright lol cat macro

*ShelbieMyLove* then embarked on an obsessive campaign to purge the macro from the internets; a campaign which I believe is unprecedented in the entire history of cat macro copyright whining and serious fucking business. Here are a few more examples of crazy cat lady’s doomed-to-failure DMCA-ing.

September 21st 2007
November 1st 2007
March 20th 2008
April 17th 2008
December 19th 2008
November 21st 2009

I also found an interesting thread on Flickr, which provides a small insight into the world of *ShelbieMyLove* and reveals a love of the exclamation mark so indicative of the very special, passive aggressive, snowflake. Shelbie the cat is apparently a peke-faced Persian with a misaligned jaw, meaning it can’t eat unassisted; Shelbie’s ‘Mom’ has to “finger feed” the wretched creature. But, hey, never mind, because its diet is 100% “organic/natural!“, “absolutely NO animal bi [sic] products!” Ironically, *ShelbieMyLove* is untroubled by the inherent cruelty of breeding highly unnatural ultra-type Persians, which suffer from a wide variety of unpleasant congenital health issues, including jaw deformities.

buying paraplegic cat leash lol cat macro

Stan Took Dental Hygiene Very Seriously

Posted in Animal Image Macros, Cat Macros by ontological_shock on December 8, 2009

toothbrush brush teeth dental hygiene flossing lol cat macro

Unlike his friends, Stan took dental hygiene very seriously

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